The black eye is healing well and the broken toe all but forgotten about it seems life is getting back to somewhere near normal if indeed it was ever normal!
Its been a very strange month of late as I have been custodian for my two youngsters as the school holidays are amongst us and as I am writing from home it made sense for me to babysit. It's a little bit of an uneasy truce though as I seldom spent a lot of time with my offspring as I was always working and now I am with them 24/7, its something I am happy about but whether the kids are quite so enamoured is a different thing altogether as no matter how hard we try us Dad's will never be as cool as Mum.
I was at the passport office in Liverpool yesterday getting the kids passports sorted as I think its time they saw a little more of the world, I managed to get everything together and the pictures countersigned along with their forms and brought along the birth certificates as instructed. So after about an hours wait our number was called and we walked over the kiosk number six, sat down and presented our paperwork. There then followed the pulling of faces and sharp intaking of breath that you dread in such situations and sure enough I was handed back the children's birth certificates and told they were the "wrong ones"
After a brief explanation it seems we were in possession of only a certificate of birth not a birth certificate (yes you heard me right) and the full certificate has the parents names on it. So another trip ensues and another wasted day due to a technicality, I would not be so bothered if I was plainly a foreigner but I am more Anglo Saxon than Alfred The Great, surely the passport office can use the certificate to verify who the father is? oh no, I have another trip to make after ordering the full certificates on line, so be warned to check the parents names are on your certificates if you head for the passport office !.
On the way back with the kids i stopped off at McDonalds as it's the done thing surely?. I manged a chicken in breadcrumbs which was called a "Legend" and the kids had to order what they wanted as I couldnt make head nor tail of what they were talking about but we ended up with a "McFlurry" and McChicken nuggets... please don't ask. I have to admit I don't like the food but the kids shouted out for a "BigMac" so as a good Dad i obliged but perhaps a good Dad would say no if he was thinking only of the kids future cholesterol levels!. This last thought brought to mind a huge guy stood in front of me in a Cafe in Liverpool centre, he had obviously had a few pies before as he was stood two feet from the counter but his belly was still touching it,
"Could I have 3 bacon, 3 sausage, 3 eggs, beans, tomatoes fried bread, hash browns and black pudding please"
"Ok sir, do you want toast with that" came the eager reply,
"yes please...... could I have wholemeal bread?"
It was at this point my muffled smirk became a full on belly laugh as I couldn't hold out any longer, here was this guy as wide as he was tall having a full heart attack breakfast and pitches the wholemeal bread in at the end as if it will deliver him from evil, you could almost imagine him at the Pearly gates,
"But Peter, I did the wholemeal !"
Bless him. Anyway we had some toast which had been at two previous cremations before it got to us and gave it the last rites before refusing to eat it, I should have been suspicious when it came to the table in an Urn.
So we skipped the mid morning snack and headed back out into the streets of Liverpool and had a walk around the docks, the kids were overjoyed to see "The Caribbean Princess was in dock so we did a photo shoot, so all in all the day wasn't a disaster but I have to do a repeat journey in a day or so, thanks Shrewsbury Registry office, I owe you one.
Its been a very strange month of late as I have been custodian for my two youngsters as the school holidays are amongst us and as I am writing from home it made sense for me to babysit. It's a little bit of an uneasy truce though as I seldom spent a lot of time with my offspring as I was always working and now I am with them 24/7, its something I am happy about but whether the kids are quite so enamoured is a different thing altogether as no matter how hard we try us Dad's will never be as cool as Mum.
I was at the passport office in Liverpool yesterday getting the kids passports sorted as I think its time they saw a little more of the world, I managed to get everything together and the pictures countersigned along with their forms and brought along the birth certificates as instructed. So after about an hours wait our number was called and we walked over the kiosk number six, sat down and presented our paperwork. There then followed the pulling of faces and sharp intaking of breath that you dread in such situations and sure enough I was handed back the children's birth certificates and told they were the "wrong ones"
After a brief explanation it seems we were in possession of only a certificate of birth not a birth certificate (yes you heard me right) and the full certificate has the parents names on it. So another trip ensues and another wasted day due to a technicality, I would not be so bothered if I was plainly a foreigner but I am more Anglo Saxon than Alfred The Great, surely the passport office can use the certificate to verify who the father is? oh no, I have another trip to make after ordering the full certificates on line, so be warned to check the parents names are on your certificates if you head for the passport office !.
On the way back with the kids i stopped off at McDonalds as it's the done thing surely?. I manged a chicken in breadcrumbs which was called a "Legend" and the kids had to order what they wanted as I couldnt make head nor tail of what they were talking about but we ended up with a "McFlurry" and McChicken nuggets... please don't ask. I have to admit I don't like the food but the kids shouted out for a "BigMac" so as a good Dad i obliged but perhaps a good Dad would say no if he was thinking only of the kids future cholesterol levels!. This last thought brought to mind a huge guy stood in front of me in a Cafe in Liverpool centre, he had obviously had a few pies before as he was stood two feet from the counter but his belly was still touching it,
"Could I have 3 bacon, 3 sausage, 3 eggs, beans, tomatoes fried bread, hash browns and black pudding please"
"Ok sir, do you want toast with that" came the eager reply,
"yes please...... could I have wholemeal bread?"
It was at this point my muffled smirk became a full on belly laugh as I couldn't hold out any longer, here was this guy as wide as he was tall having a full heart attack breakfast and pitches the wholemeal bread in at the end as if it will deliver him from evil, you could almost imagine him at the Pearly gates,
"But Peter, I did the wholemeal !"
Bless him. Anyway we had some toast which had been at two previous cremations before it got to us and gave it the last rites before refusing to eat it, I should have been suspicious when it came to the table in an Urn.
So we skipped the mid morning snack and headed back out into the streets of Liverpool and had a walk around the docks, the kids were overjoyed to see "The Caribbean Princess was in dock so we did a photo shoot, so all in all the day wasn't a disaster but I have to do a repeat journey in a day or so, thanks Shrewsbury Registry office, I owe you one.
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